Ode to Bob Barker

(This is the first in my series of poems from this semester. They will be posted periodically as I write other posts. Enjoy!)


I will spay or neuter my dog, Bob,
Because you reminded me every day
Just before you signed off
While the large lady in the lavender sweater ran
To her cache of prizes.

You reminded me and I listened,
‘Cause a boy listens to his idol.
Charismatic and suave on the stage
With your beauties by your side
Smiling and waving.

I dreamed of being the next contestant,
To come on down,
In contestant’s row to bid on a prize,
And win my way on stage for
A new car.

Or drop that Plinko chip and watch
As it careened towards the middle
But always turning at the end
Away from the $10,000 slot
To nothing.

I would be a winner, Bob,
‘Cause I wouldn’t want to let you down.
I’d walk the entire Golden Road,
Or place the Secret ‘X’ right where
It belonged.

If at the end, Mr. Barker,
I didn’t quite make the cut,
There is one thing I could promise you:
That my dog would never make
Another mutt.